do u have a moment in life u feel like suiciding?



this is the moment.
sigh.

ok i can finally access to the internet after my freaking lappy decides to screw me up. apparently it cannot even start up now which means i have totally nth to do at home. no msn, no tv series, no movies, nothing. and the sad part is i can only use internet during work. sigh.

i thought i have alot to blog about but when im here, i dun even know what to type. my life have been hectic, with family stuffs and maybe even work related stuff. somehow i dread work. mine isnt even internship. interns are suppose to learn from their work experience in whichever they are assign to but i tink im learning nuts. seriously man. sucks to be in this place.

family stuffs are complicated. dun ask me about it, dun question me about it and i dun care about it. its too complicating.

but life isnt that bad still.
i have great friends which i have known for years who wouldnt go swimming with me, fractured his leg and cant leave his house, or some other reasons. LOL!
i have my best friend who is erm, busy with projects and stuffs.
i have my gyming buddies but im very lazy to go gym.
i have friends who is very entertaining online but apparently i cant go online now.
and most importantly, i have my gf whom i know will always be with me and support me. and i love her very much. like seriously.

so for now,
i want to gym and keep fit and train for the upcoming napfa. ( im aiming for gold )
i want to spend more time with my gf cos i have been missing her constantly.
i want to spend more time with my friends cos i have been missing out alot lately.
i want to get gpa at least 3.5 for my internship but its kinda impossible now.
i want to shop for more clothes cos it's great singapore sale now.
i want to get an iPhone cos it's so nice and pretty but i got my phone not long ago.
i want to talk to my best friend about alot of things though its kinda hard to start.
i want to love you forever. =)

ok i dunno what is going through your mind right now but i do care. i do want to know but u dun let me. i know u are having some problems and i want to be there for u.

just wanna let u know i will always be there for you and u can always depend on me. no matter what.

ok now i feel useless.

i love you and pls do take care.

oh man. i've been a exceptionally good mood for the past few days. like seriously. =) yay. actually i realise i have nothing much to blog about.

anyway im glad u accepted
thats the best day of my life
i know u will always be here for me
just like how i will be there for you
and i love u too
just like i know u love me =)

oh man im so in love. damn. LOL.

omg i dunno wats wrong with me this few days. seriously feel like shit. got the depressed, emo, anxiety and god knows wat kind of emotions. crap. i tink im too pessimistic already. and guess i've been thinking too much.

im determined not to give up
so i guess u shouldnt too
god knows what will happen in the future
so walk with me to see


omg mother's day is coming. sigh. i hate this kind of family day.

songs express my feelings.

so here goes.

"Wait For You"

I never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I'm missing you
& I'm wishing that you would come back through my door
Why did you have to go? You could have let me know
So now I'm all alone,
Girl you could have stayed
but you wouldn't give me a chance
With you not around it's a little bit more then I can stand
And all my tears they keep running down my face
Why did you turn away?

So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you want it to be

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don't know what else I can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just ain't true
I really need you in my life
No matter what I have to do I'll wait for you

It's been a long time since you called me
(How could you forget about me)
You got me feeling crazy (crazy)
How can you walk away,
Everything stays the same
I just can't do it baby
What will it take to make you come back
Girl I told you what it is & it just ain't like that
Why can't you look at me, your still in love with me
Don't leave me crying.

Baby why can't we just start over again
Get it back to the way it was
If you give me a chance I can love you right
But your telling me it wont be enough

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don't know what else I can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just ain't true
I really need you in my life
No matter what I have to do I'll wait for you

So why does you pride make you run & hide
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what your keeping inside
Thats not how you want it to be

Baby I will wait for you
Baby I will wait for you
If it's the last thing I do

Baby I will wait for you
Cause I don't know what else I can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just ain't true
I really need you in my life
No matter what I have to do I'll wait for you

I'll Be Waiting.

seriously god knows what's wrong with me man. like seriously. things have be going on my mind this few days and apparently i cant find the best solutions to all. maybe god will know.

the right thing which comes at the wrong time. god knows what will happen but im sure things will work it out well. n im really happy for what we are now. =)

haven been meeting up this few days. everyone seems kinda busy or dowan to meet up. this kinda sucks man seriously.

and seriously i miss u. =(

n a nice song by secondhand serenade to share. =)

"Fall For You"

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breathe
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Your impossible to find

This is not what I intended
I always swore to you i'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may of failed
But I have loved you from the start
Ohhhh

But hold your breathe
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
Cuz talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When your asleep

Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Your impossible to find